Hojo, I Want to Die Well
Waiting Well
The pager vibrated, and I knew what it was about: Charlie White. I had been at the hospital most of the day with Charlie’s wife, Mable. Charlie, a humble auto assembly worker who would only drive Fords, would often say, “If we who live in this town don’t support what we build in this town, what will we have? A dyin town!” He was a wise prophet.
Charlie was the father of my boyhood friend, Mike. Mike was the first kid to take me into the inner circle of boys when I first moved to Charleston. I was scared and shy and a bit intimidated by the whole move. Mike walked up to me on the playground at school, stuck his hand out, and said, “My name is Mike; what’s your name? I was a new kid once” We became friends and were inseparable from that time forward. Mike and I are still friends, and I love his family as my own. His dad, Charlie, became my second father and a powerful spiritual influence in my life; I didn’t know how much until much later. He was sowing spiritual seed in my life.
Charlie loved his family and Jesus. He would have done anything for his family, and he loved to share the message of Christ with anyone who would listen, even if they wouldn’t listen. People could not help but see how he lived his life for Christ. When I became an on-call chaplain, Charlie told me repeatedly, “HoJo, our lives ought to be a liv’n sermon for all to see. If we cain’t live the life, then no sense talk’n bout the life.”
He and Mable moved from rural West Virginia to Charleston, Ohio, in the 1950s to work on the Ford assembly line. He came to make a better life for himself, his wife, and his children. Charlie grew up on a dirt farm, and he wanted more for his family. He used to say to me when I was a kid, “Charleston, Ohio, was my destiny, HoJo. It has my name in it—Charlie’s Town.”
He had been ill for some time, and the doctor called us all in to tell us that Charlie’s time of passing was imminent. Dr. Kennedy took me aside when I got there and said, “Do not leave this family; they need you here. Pray for no pain and for an easy transition. He is a good man, chaplain.”
“Yes, he is, and yes, I will stay to the end, and it will be glorious,” I replied.
The doctor turned to me and said, “Glorious? This man is going to die tonight. He is going through the fire, so to speak. Death will consume him.”
“I know he is going through the fire,” I replied, “but death will not consume him any more than the fire consumed Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego in the book of Daniel. He will pass through the valley of death to eternal life.”
“I used to believe that,” the doctor replied, “but I have seen so much pain, suffering, and death that I have become numb. I know that prayer and your presence here is … well, it’s important for him and his family, but this idea of eternal life? I just don’t know. I just don’t know anymore.” Dr. Kennedy shook his head, turned to leave, and as he left, he said, “I will be back to check in on him. Call the nurse if you need anything. We are just trying to keep him comfortable and reduce his pain.”
Charlie's family were all out in the waiting room. They needed to be with their daddy and papaw. I went to the nurses’ station and explained what I wanted to do, and the head nurse replied, “Yes of course, HoJo. Charlie and Mable need them to be in there. Take all the time you need. I don’t think it will be long before he passes.”
“Thanks, Charlotte, for all your help,” I replied.
HoJo, I want to die well!
I went to the waiting room and gathered all Charlie’s children and grandchildren. I explained what we were going to do and that it was Charlie’s request. First, Mike and his family would go in with Charlie and Mable and express their love. Next, Melva and her family would do the same. I further explained, “While Charlie is very weak physically, his mind and spirit are strong. He would be fully aware of what you are saying; just don’t expect him to respond verbally. Hugs are okay, just be gentle.”
“When you all are done saying your goodbyes, Charlie has asked us to sing two hymns as a family. However, Mike and Melva, your dad wants you to pray with him alone with your mom before the family sings together. After that, we will just wait on God.”
Earlier in the day, Charlie told me he wanted his family to sing “How Great Thou Art” and “It is Well With My Soul.” “Hojo,” he told me, “you can do these songs at my funeral also later, but I want to hear them before I die. I have one more request. I want you to sing for me and my family the hymn ‘God Leads us Along.’ You know, ‘Some through the waters, some through the flood, Some through the fire, and some through the..some through the...oh I forget the rest.”
I continued, “Some through the fire but all through the blood; Some through great sorrow, but God gives a song, In the night season and all the day long.
“Yes, that is it! Can you do it? Charlie asked.
“Yes,” I replied, “it would be my honor.”
“HoJo, I want to die well!”
Each family came in and spent their time with Charlie. Then I asked everyone, except Mike and Melva, to return to the waiting area for a few moments. I closed the door to give them space. I was about to leave when Mike opened the door and said that Charlie wanted me to be there as well.
The next fifteen minutes or so were a blessed time of prayer mixed with laughter and tears. Charlie looked up at us and said, “I love you all. Now, let’s sing my hymns.”
I went to get the rest of the family, and Melva took her place next to her mom, who was sitting in a chair, and Mike took his place to the right of his father. When the families returned, they instinctively took their respective places on the right and left sides of the bed. I took my place at the foot of the bed. Some grabbed hands, and some hugged. Silently, Dr. Kennedy and Charlotte, the nurse, slipped into the room and watched from behind me.
The family began to sing “How Great Thou Art,” and it was almost angelic. There were just pure voices sailing on the notes and lyrics.
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
There was not a dry eye in that room. Even the doubting Dr. Kennedy was moved to tears.
Then, the family sang “It Is Well With My Soul.” By the end of that song, the room's door was open, and we could see all the nursing staff and others had gathered outside. It was stunning.
Then Charlie spoke with supernatural strength, “ HoJo, I want you to read the scripture I asked you to read. Then please sing the song I requested.
“Charlie, this is what the Lord says— he who created you, Charlie, he who formed you, Charlie: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; Charlie, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, Charlie, and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, Charlie, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, Charlie, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; ..” Isaiah 43:1-3 NIV
Then I began to sing.
In shady, green pastures, so rich and so sweet,
God leads His dear children along;
Where the water’s cool flow bathes the weary one’s feet,
God leads His dear children along.
Some through the waters, some through the flood,
Some through the fire, but all through the blood;
Some through great sorrow, but God gives a song,
In the night season and all the day long.
When I finished the refrain for the last time, there was a holy hush in the room. We all gazed upon Charlie’s face. His eyes were closed, but he had a smile on his face. There was no rhythmic rise and fall of his chest; Charlie had passed to his Savior’s arms. He was finally home. He died well.